Be the person you always needed
This is not the 1st or the last time I will go down this path… Who did you need when you were x old? That is how I look at relationships, personal and professional. If someone is younger, I ask myself who I needed when I was their age? I do my best to then be that person. Just because I got old, does not mean people owe me anything. I look at it the other way; because I have had the privilege to age, I owe everyone the benefit of my experience.
If you have lived 1 second, you have valuable experience. The greatest teacher is life and the most important things we can share are effort and experience. Before modern education, how did we define value? Value was and always has been based on sharing. We either share our efforts, creations, and experiences. I don’t care who you are, what you think about your life…. Every single one of us has value because we are in a constant state of creation and effort while gaining experience with every tick of the clock. If you ever want to move forward and get somewhere worth getting, you have to recognize all of this and pass it on.
When I was younger, I wanted to be the prick that most older people were being to me. I hated what they were doing but I was being conditioned to be that too. My payback would come by being able to unleash my wrath on the newbies I no longer was. What a dumb fucking idea! I wasted a few years being the authoritarian dick I was trained and conditioned to be. It really didn't do much for me. I didn’t get anywhere great, and I didn’t make any great relationships during that time. When I woke up to the negative reality of my actions, I pivoted. I went to a much more appreciative model.
Crazy what a little empathy and gratitude can do. I have made amends with most of the people I was a dick too. I cut ties with “old school” heads that just couldn’t let go of the “power”. I also started to make more money and have many more opportunities come across my desk. Giving way more than I took completely changed my life.
If you were beat down on the way up, don’t beat the next guy down. Lift them up and show people that there is a better way. I am not saying to baby everyone either. Sometimes lifting someone up comes in the form of a pat on the back and other times it is a kick in the ass. The key is knowing when to employ what a person needs, not what you want. Just be that guy you needed when you see the need in somebody else.
We all said we at some point we don’t want to get old or become our parents. Here is the secret; just don’t do it.