The value of not giving a F%ck

I say it quite often “I don’t give a fuck.” Now I have to clarify. I don’t mean I have zero care for anything. I actually care quite a bit about the things I care about. The things is, I just don’t care about many of the things people around me do.

Things I don’t give a fuck about:

  1. What anyone thinks or says about me. The only 2 people that get my attention here are my wife and my son.

  2. Failure

  3. The past

  4. Intention

Let me break down why I don’t give a fuck about these things. It is pretty simple. I am not a child without experience. I am a man who has walked enough miles to get a real understanding of what his value is. I have responsibilities that I take seriously which keep me focused on what matters. I have confidence forged thru hard work plus a bit of pain and suffering. Basically I have lived the same life as you, I have just made sure that I have paid attention to the details and gone deep into the meaning of my experience.

I am not special, we are all alike. It is what we choose to focus on the defines the level of depth we can achieve in our understanding of what we have done and where we have been.

I do not focus on the opinions of sheep. Say what you want about me, it will not change me. I will do what I know to be right. Love me or hate me, I don’t care as long as I can lay my head down at night knowing I did the right thing and I did it with everything I have.

I do not care about failure because it has been my greatest teacher and a given when living a life that strives to achieve great results. I fail more than I win but the wins are great enough to justify the failure.

The past is always lurking. We can live with it as a lead weight holding us down or we can learn from it and move forward smarter, stronger, and more appreciative of the opportunity in front of us.

Intention is bullshit without actions that map towards it. So many people push the idea that intention is so important. I guess it is, but I will not give your actions a pass if they do not map towards your intent. Action is everything. It is what defines and is what you will be remembered for.

If the company I am President of today fires me tomorrow, I don’t give a fuck. I did the right thing each day while working towards the accomplishment of agreed upon goals. If that is not enough for the CEO, I don’t give a fuck. I believe in my actions and can do them anywhere. If someone wants to work with me, great. If not, no problem cause I don’t give a fuck.

If I make a mistake, I don’t sit around figuring out how to cover it up or pass on the blame. I don’t give a fuck, I own it and move forward knowing what not to do again. If someone below me in the food-chain fucks up, it is my fault for putting the wrong person in the wrong place, or not giving them what they needed to be successful. So again, I don’t give a fuck. I accept responsibility and move on.

I can go on and on with many scenarios. But not giving a fuck comes down to not wasting time wishing, pondering, and hoping. I deal with reality and keep driving forward. No judgement, just analytics. I make moves to keep everything moving forward in a positive direction.

Don’t mistake not giving a fuck for vulgarity or lack of care. I speak how I speak in the proper context. I am not walking into my son’s school and dropping F bombs. I also care quite a bit so I choose to not hate you for your decisions, I shoulder all the blame, I give away all the credit, and I put all of my energies into doing the right thing. I guess I do give a fuck?

Thanks for reading and I hope you find some value in these words. I am not writing this to say I am better. I just am defining how I am.

Brian Wright