Ever get stuck in the downward spiral where you are feeling anxiety due to the fact that you are feeling anxiety? The double negative pit of despair! It is not just anxiety, it can be anything negative. You get this negative thing in thought, emotion, or feeling that you double down on because you feel flawed for having it happen. 1 thing turns into multiple and you drown in your own negative self opinion. You thought it was just you, sorry to let you in on the big secret; we are all human and suffer from the same experiences. What separates us is what we do in response to our commonality.
Why do you care that you are having a negative response to something the world is throwing at you? Is it a personal thing or is it the potential opinions of others? I don’t know anyone that wants to intentionally be perceived in a negative light. We get trapped in the idea that weakness is a flaw that people will harshly judge us for. The truth is, our vulnerabilities are our common strength. Bad people will attack you for being strong as well as weak, while good people respect your honesty and see your transparency about your vulnerabilities as a strength.
Being able to be honest is as much about the people around us as much as it is our ability to communicate with ourselves. Who we have around us is do to our choices. Having people that see vulnerability as a selfish opportunity around us, is the result of poor choices. We collect what we put out. The less we care about the opinions of others, the weird thing that happens is – better people tend to gravitate towards us.
You want of the fear and anxiety, it comes with letting go of attachments to the opinions of others. Not caring about what people think allows for you to deal with your own self without distraction. Having the confidence to be who you are allows for you to deal with whatever comes your way. If the 1st battle is against the court of public opinion, you are losing the time and energy you need to deal with yourself effectively. Who cares what the world thinks about your issues? The world has the same issues and has no positive reason to throw negativity on any issues you are dealing with.
Let go of the idea that other people are judging you, make choices that surround you with people you trust yourself to be vulnerable with, and recognize that you are human, which means you are never alone, never the only one… You have anxiety, OK, so what? Develop the coping skills to effectively deal with it. No need to beat yourself up or feel weak.
The double negative stops when you stop judging yourself. Be analytical and own your current state. Don’t be afraid of who you are, embrace it. Truth is the only solid foundation we can build anything on.
Brian Wright